Saturday, July 09, 2011

Friday Reflections

This is turning into a pattern - I think of different things I'd like to write about throughout the week, but I put it off until I'm forced to do it on Fridays. Maybe I need to committ to writing a very small post daily so I don't forget all those little thoughts floating in and out of my consciousness.

But for today:

1. Andy and I have our 6 year anniversary tomorrow. In some ways that seems impossible, and in other ways I feel we've been married for much longer than that. And I mean that in a good way. These days we operate as a team, trying to coordinate schedules and appointments and meals and's impossible for me to imagine doing this alone, and impossible for me to imagine doing this with anyone else. I am blessed.

2. Last night after his baseball game, James reminded me we only have 4 more left. A couple months ago, the baseball schedule stretched out before me like a never-ending road, and all I could see were lots of fast-food meals, late nights for Hazel, and evenings spent slapping away mosquitoes while we tried to cheer on our team. But now it's almost over, and though all of those things I imagined did happen, we've also seen James improve through practice and discipline, and the look on his face when he hits a homerun or helps bring in a run has made it well worth it. Next up: football!

3. It seems like a long time ago already, but we really enjoyed our trip to Omaha. James loved swimming in the pool at the hotel and hanging out with some of Andy's younger cousins. Even if one of them did hit him in the face (right between his eyebrows) with a baseball, prompting Andy to call him Jake from Avatar for the rest of the weekend. And Hazel made good use of all the extra people by soaking up every bit of attention she could. She smiled, flirted, crawled, laughed, and ate whatever she could put in her mouth. And did her best to wake up every hour on the hour. Apparently sleeping in the same room is a bad idea.

4. I'm realizing amidst the chaotic schedule and the tyranny of the urgent, I need to decide to use some of my time to refresh myself so I can keep up with everything. There are days I feel like I'm not cut out to be a working mother of two (ok pretty much every day) and every once in a while I remember to take a step back, remember what God's heart for our family is, and just take a few minutes to do something I enjoy. Those 10 minutes weren't going to accomplish that much anyway. :)

5. One of the questions James repeatedly asks Andy and I is "Did you put it on facebook?" This usually comes after he does something that makes us laugh, or after we take a picture of him, or after he wins a game, or accomplishes something at school. And while Andy and I have to hide our smiles sometimes at the obvious desire for attention, it's got me thinking a lot about how facebook and blogs have affected my perception and how I experience and process things. It's easy for me to feel the need to craft an experience or a moment into a perfectly captured picture or memory...and then make sure it's available for everyone to see. And sometimes I find myself falling into the trap of thinking those moments aren't worth as much if no one else knows about them. But that's a pretty dangerous thought, and most importantly it can take my focus out of the moment and place it on how to document it later. Funny how much easier this is to recognize in someone else.


Ang said...

I love your #5 thoughts. Those same ponderings float around in my mind a lot too... You just wrote it better than my brain usually thinks it.
Isn't it scary to watch small childish quirks in your children reflect back to you your own adult tendencies. Maya and I have been talking about manipulation lately. Hers is just more obvious than mine these days...but everytime I see it, it's like a disgusting mirror reflection.

Anonymous said...

I was thinking the same thing as Ang stated above- I appreciate your comments on #5. It's something I think about, but you put it in words better than I can. :)
Happy Anniversary!

Anonymous said...

I feel like I totally do the same thing! Like whenever Karl gets me flowers or other presents, I want to put up pictures online so everyone can see. It's very strange and makes me wonder if a lot of my motivation is putting up a good front for others. (look how mature marriage is making me!) : )