I really like blogging. It gives me a space to allow my thoughts to be known and heard, first to myself, and then to anyone who happens to stop by. It's good for me to edit my thoughts and organize the blur of activities into recognizable memories for myself.
But there are so many great blogs out there, and even though it's just about the worst thing you can do for yourself, I sometimes end up comparing my blog (life) with their blogs (lives), and theirs just seem so much more inspired, full of moments captured in light drenched photos, impossibly delicious food, funny little happenings, poignant moments of realization. Meanwhile my life seems really full of hasty meals on the run, scrambling to get to baseball games on time, laundry, trying not to look too closely at the floors in my house, and ever-growing to-do lists. Now I know that everyone has dishes and errands and busy schedules and that we just post about the things that bring us joy to make the other stuff more bearable. But it seems like everyone else has more time/creativity/energy/fun in their lives to blog about. And yes I am totally whining right now.
This is a perspective problem. A heart problem really. My life is full of beauty, love, relationships, undeserved grace, and more than I could possibly need. But on most days, I choose to focus on the things I find stressful, and I choke the joy out. I tell myself others have more opportunities to relax and enjoy the moments of laughter and joy in their days, and I wonder when I will be able to slow down and do the same. And I'm beginning to realize the answer is not more free time or better pictures or writing more creative posts. It's just experiencing the moments of my day when they happen instead of waiting for everything to be perfect before I can enjoy them.
Now that I have that on the table, I can get back to posting. I hope. :)
But there are so many great blogs out there, and even though it's just about the worst thing you can do for yourself, I sometimes end up comparing my blog (life) with their blogs (lives), and theirs just seem so much more inspired, full of moments captured in light drenched photos, impossibly delicious food, funny little happenings, poignant moments of realization. Meanwhile my life seems really full of hasty meals on the run, scrambling to get to baseball games on time, laundry, trying not to look too closely at the floors in my house, and ever-growing to-do lists. Now I know that everyone has dishes and errands and busy schedules and that we just post about the things that bring us joy to make the other stuff more bearable. But it seems like everyone else has more time/creativity/energy/fun in their lives to blog about. And yes I am totally whining right now.
This is a perspective problem. A heart problem really. My life is full of beauty, love, relationships, undeserved grace, and more than I could possibly need. But on most days, I choose to focus on the things I find stressful, and I choke the joy out. I tell myself others have more opportunities to relax and enjoy the moments of laughter and joy in their days, and I wonder when I will be able to slow down and do the same. And I'm beginning to realize the answer is not more free time or better pictures or writing more creative posts. It's just experiencing the moments of my day when they happen instead of waiting for everything to be perfect before I can enjoy them.
Now that I have that on the table, I can get back to posting. I hope. :)
1 comment:
Great post. I was just thinking the same thing this week- comparing my posts to others. I was letting myself feel inferior about what I was writing and thinking that I wish I was better at it so that others could be inspired. But really it's God doing the inspiring and He may choose to use me in that way or He may not. Anyway, slightly different than what you were talking about but just made me think of it. I appreciate hearing your thoughts.
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